Firstly, I haven't read any good novels this summer - I've been reading factual books about bones and death rituals.
Does anyone have any reccommendations novel-wise?
Secondly, I'm about to go and visit my grandad in hospital, but am doing very little else other than dreading travelling tomorrow.
Thirdly, I was asked to define "cis-" as in cis woman, cis man, cis person.
"Cis" just means "non-trans". So, "cissexual" means non-transsexual, and "cisgender" means non-transgender.
Why do we need this piece of "jargon"? Why not just say "non-trans"?
Now, monotheistic religious people are welcome to refuse to use "cis-", because they believe that God created Normal Default Humans, and that trans people deviate from those norms - thus, Normal Default Humans need no label, and deviations do.
However, the majority of people I know are not religious lunatics, so need to scrap the idea of the Normal Default Human, understanding that trans people have existed in every society and in all periods of human existence. Therefore, we are products of the natural diversity that keeps species alive.
For example, I've heard American politicians use the phrase "people and black people" a few times, and don't wish to do so again.
Some of them were Democrats.
You can't make this stuff up.
Tuesday, 29 July 2008
Monday, 28 July 2008
Sunday, 27 July 2008
Nomenclature
I've found, as I'm sure every other trans person on the planet has found, that a lot of people think that using my old name is OK. Whether their reasoning is "I knew this person before" or "I just keep forgetting" or "This person is surely just going to use hir name as a nickname anyway", the result is still the same.
Now, all this reasoning is sensible. That's why I'm not angry with the people who still use nothing but my old name, or *almost* nothing, or use my real name in a *jokey* fashion.
So, this is an educational post, which explains what many trans people (i.e. all trans people with a readin' bent, who thus know a bit about trans history; or all people whose lives have been blighted by transphobic violence) understand to be the connotations of such actions.
Edit: I had a long and boring analogy here... it was long, boring and pointless. It was about connotations of language use that only the recipient is likely to understand.
Use of a trans person's old name without apology will always connote the words and actions of people who actively refuse to use the new one. Those people will include, depending on the trans person:
Harold Johnson, who had changed his name to "Joanne" (or whoever)
Harold Johnson, who preferred to be called "Joanne"
I don't want to link to any of the hundreds floating about the web - I read them once to take in the information, but don't want to give bigoted people any more traffic.
Do you see how these journalists become complicit in rape and murder (because it's nearly always both)? The best-known real-life case:
1) Brandon Teena is raped, to prove he is "really a woman" and can thus be raped like one
2) Brandon Teena is murdered, because he was "deceitful", because he was "really a woman"
3) Brandon Teena is referred to as Teena Brandon in all media coverage, because he is "really a woman"
Well, as long as we know, that removes all the little details of, what was it? Rape and murder or something...
However, the majority of transphobic violence is still against trans women. This is the usual story; a trans woman is rejected by her family (who obviously wouldn't use her real name) from a young age for being trans; or can't get a job (her potential employer wouldn't use her real name, would they?) because she's trans; so she is working in the sex trade or at least sleeping with abusive men that she wouldn't otherwise go near, because she needs support. One of her clients or boyfriends murders her, and the half-inch of media coverage does not use her real name.
I said I'd make this post coherent when I was awake... well, I haven't.
But the point is... "David, sorry, I mean Elaine" is the sentence that trans people will weep with joy to hear, if you (understandably) forget our names.
Incidentally, I'm full of insatiable curiosity, so I've asked every post-social-transition trans person I know "What was your birth name?"
Some people will find that perfectly fine, because I've previously established that it's just general nosiness rather than an attempt to discredit their identity...
Some will always hate it, because they've got some understandable sensitivity over the issue.
I never said I had all the answers.
Now, all this reasoning is sensible. That's why I'm not angry with the people who still use nothing but my old name, or *almost* nothing, or use my real name in a *jokey* fashion.
So, this is an educational post, which explains what many trans people (i.e. all trans people with a readin' bent, who thus know a bit about trans history; or all people whose lives have been blighted by transphobic violence) understand to be the connotations of such actions.
Edit: I had a long and boring analogy here... it was long, boring and pointless. It was about connotations of language use that only the recipient is likely to understand.
Use of a trans person's old name without apology will always connote the words and actions of people who actively refuse to use the new one. Those people will include, depending on the trans person:
- Friends and family members who couldn't accept hir, and thus cut hir out of their lives - and if you are family or good friends, then the trans person will have heard enough horror stories from hir trans friends for hir to dread a similar situation.
- Public figures who promote transphobia.
- Their obituaries and reports of their murders.
Harold Johnson, who had changed his name to "Joanne" (or whoever)
Harold Johnson, who preferred to be called "Joanne"
I don't want to link to any of the hundreds floating about the web - I read them once to take in the information, but don't want to give bigoted people any more traffic.
Do you see how these journalists become complicit in rape and murder (because it's nearly always both)? The best-known real-life case:
1) Brandon Teena is raped, to prove he is "really a woman" and can thus be raped like one
2) Brandon Teena is murdered, because he was "deceitful", because he was "really a woman"
3) Brandon Teena is referred to as Teena Brandon in all media coverage, because he is "really a woman"
Well, as long as we know, that removes all the little details of, what was it? Rape and murder or something...
However, the majority of transphobic violence is still against trans women. This is the usual story; a trans woman is rejected by her family (who obviously wouldn't use her real name) from a young age for being trans; or can't get a job (her potential employer wouldn't use her real name, would they?) because she's trans; so she is working in the sex trade or at least sleeping with abusive men that she wouldn't otherwise go near, because she needs support. One of her clients or boyfriends murders her, and the half-inch of media coverage does not use her real name.
I said I'd make this post coherent when I was awake... well, I haven't.
But the point is... "David, sorry, I mean Elaine" is the sentence that trans people will weep with joy to hear, if you (understandably) forget our names.
Incidentally, I'm full of insatiable curiosity, so I've asked every post-social-transition trans person I know "What was your birth name?"
Some people will find that perfectly fine, because I've previously established that it's just general nosiness rather than an attempt to discredit their identity...
Some will always hate it, because they've got some understandable sensitivity over the issue.
I never said I had all the answers.
Saturday, 26 July 2008
Autism
Silverback has asked how autism affects me.
This - read the post "A Serious Discussion", currently the third post down - is how autism affects me.
That kind of thing happens to me pretty much continuously.
IF I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU, IT'S NOT BECAUSE "I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU", UNLESS YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAVE DONE SOMETHING TRULY HORRIBLE. IT'S BECAUSE MY COMMUNICATION RESOURCES HAVE BEEN EXPENDED.
(In a nutshell, however - I'm both extremely intelligent and extremely retarded. I average out to an average person in some aspects - for example, my uni grades).
This - read the post "A Serious Discussion", currently the third post down - is how autism affects me.
That kind of thing happens to me pretty much continuously.
IF I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU, IT'S NOT BECAUSE "I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU", UNLESS YOU KNOW THAT YOU HAVE DONE SOMETHING TRULY HORRIBLE. IT'S BECAUSE MY COMMUNICATION RESOURCES HAVE BEEN EXPENDED.
(In a nutshell, however - I'm both extremely intelligent and extremely retarded. I average out to an average person in some aspects - for example, my uni grades).
Friday, 25 July 2008
Bearlesque!
Gareth has found a new vocation - when he grows up, he doesn't WANT to be an IT guy any more, he wants to join these guys.
He's given me my birthday present early... and it's an ipod... and he's had it engraved.
This is my *well impressed* face.
lovelovelovelovelove.
He's given me my birthday present early... and it's an ipod... and he's had it engraved.
This is my *well impressed* face.
lovelovelovelovelove.
I Like Corpse Paint and I Cannot Lie
In other news, Buck Angel, trans porn hero, says some darned stupid things in this interview.
Here we go:
Here, he doesn't like guys having fundraisers for their surgery:
"Buck worked two jobs to pay for his surgery, and the sense of pride that comes along with that achievement itself nicely complements the satisfaction of finally feeling comfortable in one’s own skin. “But a boob-cutting-off party?” he asks. “What the fuck is that?""
Oh Buck, you absolute fucking moron. Shall we look over the stats and find out what percentage of trans Americans can get jobs? Because of, y'know, the lack of employment legislation protecting gender identity?
Also, WHY do we (theoretically) get SRS on the NHS here? Because many transsexual people can't function without it - it's a medical necessity. If you're not those people, fine - but you could recognise their existence. So, the real issue is that there is no Health Service in many countries.
And that's disgusting, yes? We on the same page? If we're not, anybody, and you want to give me the "pulling-self-up-by-bootstraps" SHITE so commonly thrown out by Americans, who are MYSTERIOUSLY all white and able-bodied and have never been ill in their whole fucking lives?
Nope, let's not have a go at the system. Let's have a go at individuals with gender dysphoria and no money, because that's far more helpful.
Another gem:
“It just seems so female,” Buck says of the trend, "
Hooray! Let's... rip into trans people's identities! 'Cause we really need that. If a cis man threw a similar event, everyone with a brain would be all "Hooray! It's so nice that men are shedding their Neanderthal* stereotypes, helping one another and talking about their feelings! That's really good for their mental health."
But because they're trans, it's open season on their identities.
Buck reminds me of Jayne Cobb in the face - but when it happens personality-wise, that's less good.
Other trans people are more likely to understand that you're a man than anyone else, Buck - so don't throw out comments like that while trying to prove how MANLY and MASCULINE and VERY VERY MANLY you are to everyone else. We're actually your biggest allies, your fellow men with vaginas.
When some trans moron gives you trouble because he's got a surgical dick and you haven't, just berate him for being classist (and stop being classist yourself), mention all the other guys happy with what Nature gave them, and move on. Don't rip into the rest of us.
On a vaguely similar note, I wish there were more depictions of masculinity in movies. I don't find the clean-cut American clone version very attractive... Humans, please, not Ken dolls. Humans with wind-blown hair and beards and more than two facial expressions, and, and, Nordic battleaxes.
Yeah, last night I found SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER Harvey more interesting *after* half his face melted END SPOILER, that's how bored I am by that whole look.
*I don't intend to contribute to Homo Neanderthalensis' (not Homo Sapiens Neanderthalensis, FOOLS, incidentally) bad press. It's just the way people often put it.
Here we go:
Here, he doesn't like guys having fundraisers for their surgery:
"Buck worked two jobs to pay for his surgery, and the sense of pride that comes along with that achievement itself nicely complements the satisfaction of finally feeling comfortable in one’s own skin. “But a boob-cutting-off party?” he asks. “What the fuck is that?""
Oh Buck, you absolute fucking moron. Shall we look over the stats and find out what percentage of trans Americans can get jobs? Because of, y'know, the lack of employment legislation protecting gender identity?
Also, WHY do we (theoretically) get SRS on the NHS here? Because many transsexual people can't function without it - it's a medical necessity. If you're not those people, fine - but you could recognise their existence. So, the real issue is that there is no Health Service in many countries.
And that's disgusting, yes? We on the same page? If we're not, anybody, and you want to give me the "pulling-self-up-by-bootstraps" SHITE so commonly thrown out by Americans, who are MYSTERIOUSLY all white and able-bodied and have never been ill in their whole fucking lives?
Nope, let's not have a go at the system. Let's have a go at individuals with gender dysphoria and no money, because that's far more helpful.
Another gem:
“It just seems so female,” Buck says of the trend, "
Hooray! Let's... rip into trans people's identities! 'Cause we really need that. If a cis man threw a similar event, everyone with a brain would be all "Hooray! It's so nice that men are shedding their Neanderthal* stereotypes, helping one another and talking about their feelings! That's really good for their mental health."
But because they're trans, it's open season on their identities.
Buck reminds me of Jayne Cobb in the face - but when it happens personality-wise, that's less good.
Other trans people are more likely to understand that you're a man than anyone else, Buck - so don't throw out comments like that while trying to prove how MANLY and MASCULINE and VERY VERY MANLY you are to everyone else. We're actually your biggest allies, your fellow men with vaginas.
When some trans moron gives you trouble because he's got a surgical dick and you haven't, just berate him for being classist (and stop being classist yourself), mention all the other guys happy with what Nature gave them, and move on. Don't rip into the rest of us.
On a vaguely similar note, I wish there were more depictions of masculinity in movies. I don't find the clean-cut American clone version very attractive... Humans, please, not Ken dolls. Humans with wind-blown hair and beards and more than two facial expressions, and, and, Nordic battleaxes.
Yeah, last night I found SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER Harvey more interesting *after* half his face melted END SPOILER, that's how bored I am by that whole look.
*I don't intend to contribute to Homo Neanderthalensis' (not Homo Sapiens Neanderthalensis, FOOLS, incidentally) bad press. It's just the way people often put it.
Fools
Yesterday, my friend David was discussing the stupidity of the customers who phone his company. He says they get a heck of a lot of Daily Mail readers, and a lot of people who can't do basic adding up "I've just phoned you to ask what £21.99 plus £4.99 is".
Hmm, could the two things POSSIBLY be connected? Perhaps they think that maths is deeply suspect, as it was invented by Asians.
In the same vein m00nlogicwise, I mention that the US Religious Reich is now boycotting McDonald's (I'm not linking to that kind of website!) because it scored 85 on a "Corporate Equality Index" (i.e. it has pledged not to be homophobic).
Me: "But... what will they eat now? I thought American bigots ate lots of fast food. Are they gonna lose a lot of weight? What are they going to eat instead?"
David: "KFC?"
L: (deadpan) "Negroes."
Laugh now, and you're a Bad Person. Don't laugh, and you might have had your sense of humour surgically removed.
Incidentally, this conversation was on the way to the cinema to see The Dark Knight (review: stuff asploded). Directly behind me in the cinema was The World's Fifth Most Annoying Person, whom I will henceforth call Daft Bint.
Daft Bint was obviously under the impression that the film *really* needed ad libbing, and God had chosen her for the task. Also, she took a while to understand the very predictable plot twists, but she made sure her boyfriend knew about them once she did.
"HE DIDN'T THINK THAT THROUGH, DID HE?"
"OH, OH THAT'S CLEVER."
"OOOOOOOH." (not an orgasm, a noise of excitement whenever something blew up... or there was an action scene of any stripe... or, when anything happened, really)
Also, she couldn't sit still for over a microsecond.
Ascuse me, I has fed you your own mouth.
I'd better add a disclaimer: Y'know, I don't hang around with people who would *really* use the word "Negro".
Hmm, could the two things POSSIBLY be connected? Perhaps they think that maths is deeply suspect, as it was invented by Asians.
In the same vein m00nlogicwise, I mention that the US Religious Reich is now boycotting McDonald's (I'm not linking to that kind of website!) because it scored 85 on a "Corporate Equality Index" (i.e. it has pledged not to be homophobic).
Me: "But... what will they eat now? I thought American bigots ate lots of fast food. Are they gonna lose a lot of weight? What are they going to eat instead?"
David: "KFC?"
L: (deadpan) "Negroes."
Laugh now, and you're a Bad Person. Don't laugh, and you might have had your sense of humour surgically removed.
Incidentally, this conversation was on the way to the cinema to see The Dark Knight (review: stuff asploded). Directly behind me in the cinema was The World's Fifth Most Annoying Person, whom I will henceforth call Daft Bint.
Daft Bint was obviously under the impression that the film *really* needed ad libbing, and God had chosen her for the task. Also, she took a while to understand the very predictable plot twists, but she made sure her boyfriend knew about them once she did.
"HE DIDN'T THINK THAT THROUGH, DID HE?"
"OH, OH THAT'S CLEVER."
"OOOOOOOH." (not an orgasm, a noise of excitement whenever something blew up... or there was an action scene of any stripe... or, when anything happened, really)
Also, she couldn't sit still for over a microsecond.
Ascuse me, I has fed you your own mouth.
I'd better add a disclaimer: Y'know, I don't hang around with people who would *really* use the word "Negro".
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