Wednesday, 17 December 2008

Questions...

Is there an equivalent, for any other group of people, to pronoun slips for trans people? Something that is not necessarily purposeful, but can be purposeful, and pops up in every single conversation?

Because I can't imagine somebody who really does care about somebody else, say, a overweight person who's sensitive about their appearance, talking like this:

"Catherine, who is a lard-arse, went to work today, and she's got a fucking massive arse, and she got some difficult calls from customers, god, she's fat and ugly, and then she went home".

And, once one person doesn't bother to use the right pronoun, it infects other people, and the trans person is immediately totally undermined -

"What did that hideous gargantuan woman do after that?"

Is there an equivalent? Of course, people from every marginalised group have to face racism, or ableism, or whatever continously - but from people who truly care about them? And even from people who understands, to whatever extent that is possible, what it's like to be them?

I also want to know - what proportion of post-hormones, post-op transsexuals are really no-hormones, no-op transsexuals who were just desperate not to have that discomfort and pain in every. single. conversation?

2 comments:

Lucy said...

Yes, I think that's a unique problem that we have.

Dizzy said...

Hello! I linked here from 'My Dad's a Communist' I truly hope you don't mind my being here. If you do, just drop me an email,and I will not read again, I promise. (sorry, I bought a job load of commas with a short use by date)

As one of the people who love you I can only say these things.
Sincerest apologies for the times I use an inappropriate word. It is entirely accidental. Few people have the clarity of brain that you possess; being officially an Old Fart, my brain runs in ruts and furrows, and takes time to create a new line to redirect my braincell to the correct words. My acceptance of you as Olli is more complete than my speech pattern may lead you to believe.
The only person I call a lard-arse is myself - I'd sit on anyone who called me or anyone else that, so the snag is that the words that are inappropriate to use for you are appropriate for other people.
Some people may need time to readjust the brain, some just don't understand, some won't understand.
However, I am very willing to come and sit on people who refuse even to try to use the appropriate words.

(Hagrid's mum, in case you don't recognise the screen name)